It’s funny, I’m sitting here typing this, and it’s the little things that make me realise – I’m still making huge strides still.
The photo I’ve used is 91 days old from this date of publication – it was the first time I went to a bar to drink, it was a closed event, and I knew pretty much everyone who was there – and I was nervous.
Tonight though I went to an event – I knew one person, and apart from my shyness to mingle, I didn’t have a single moment where I thought – what the hell am I doing. From parking in a car park, walking down the street, going into a bar where I had no idea the layout – or the people, walking through the crowd to the event, and then I was happy to drink, chat, and locate where the female toilets were. Then leaving and walking back to my car.
It may seem like I’m making a mountain out of a mole hill, and look I do understand that – hello, we’ve done this for years, there is nothing special, but you need to remember that for a number of transgender people the anxiety is very real – and it’s take me a long time to get there – but for me – it’s also been a short time. Even in November – I didn’t see me going to a bar where I know just one person.
I never really had a roadmap of where I wanted to be at this time of my journey – but when I see these milestones, they really make me proud.
So yes – I remember as a kid – not allowed out on a school night, and I’ve been out the last two nights – and I’ve not been afraid – and I love it.
So raising a glass to everyone – cheers.