Anyone who has ever tried to compliment me on anything knows, I will downplay it – oh it was because of this or that, it’s nothing much, but seldom will I take it, and say thank you.

This is an area I’m working with my counsellor on. And today she said something to me, and I opened my mouth to downplay it, and I stopped, and said. Thank you.

Most of my life I couldn’t find reasons why people would like me – They didn’t know me, I wouldn’t let them through my barriers, and if I open myself I will suffer, I will get hurt, and I didn’t want that.

But if I’m going to live to my full now, I need to change that thinking. I need to be sincere and when people tell me something – instead of trying to deny it, accept it.

It’s going to hurt – there is so much to unravel, so many years of hurt, but I will do it.